AU #666: A TINGE OF DOUBT CROSSES MY MIND

[halfcocked]

[sprawled on Hakuren's bed with his laptop, dicking around on Google again; without preamble, begins to read in an attempt at a silky voice:]


I dream'd this mortal part of mine
Was Metamorphoz'd to a Vine;
Which crawling one and every way
Enthralled my dainty Lucia.
Me thought, her long small legs & thighs
I with my Tendrils did surprize;
Her Belly, Buttocks, and her Waste
By my soft Nerv'lits were--


--her what? This one sucks! Lemme find a better one. Her waste!?

Comments

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

I'm just -- thinking! About us, about things -- general things, nothing you have to worry about--

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

What, did I do something again?

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

It's not you, Devit. You haven't done anything.

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

[sighs and settles against Hakuren, reaching over to tug on his hair]

What's with you . . . something happen? Should I go rough someone up?

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

Rough someone -- no, Devit. It's not like that.

[rolls a bit, so he can look up] Just thinking.

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

[adjusts to accommodate this, comfortable]

Okay, so . . . tell me!

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

. . .

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

[waiting]

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

...




... Why are you here, really?

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

. . . Because you're here? And it's comfy? And private? And I can bug you all I want? You--you want me to go--is that it?? This is my favorite place to be!

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

That's not quite it -- why are you here? Why here, why me?

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

Oh.

[ . . . shrugs] You're my favorite? You're interesting! You're sexy! It's fun to be around you! You listen to me! You're interested in me! I trust you, I can tell you're not fucking with me. So I can relax, I guess . . . it just feels good to be around you. Haven't I told you all this stuff?

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

Mm, you have.

It's still something I keep thinking about, though.

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

You think I don't? I wonder pretty much every day why you haven't sold me out to the Exorcists yet!

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

--why would I do something like that?

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

'Cuz I don't get how you could possibly like me more than them? They're the good guys--that's what any human would think, anyway.

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

I spend more time with you than I have with all of them put together. They're good people, but ...

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

You would think--

[cuts off] --but I don't even really wanna argue that with you . . . I can't win, you can't win against me, that's just how it is! There's no point in arguing it. I don't really mind anymore. Camp's got me used to it, it doesn't bug me much. That's just how things are! It's not worth fighting about, I'd rather have fun with you! You know, when we first met, I really looked forward to arguing with you all the time?

[rubbing Hakuren's back again, relaxed]

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

I would think what? --You did? I mean, I remember you picking your share of fights, but ... really, the more you talked, the less I really thought we'd get anywhere ...

[relaxing a little himself, settling]

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

That they're good people. Yeah, it was fun! It's still fun! ♪ You always listened to me instead of just getting pissed or blowing me off . . . like you might actually wanna understand.

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

I see no reason to believe otherwise, in how they've acted. Of course I wanted to understand. You're -- very different, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't get your say. And I wanted to learn.

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

I know. Yeah, well . . . I'm not used to that. So . . . thanks. [a little shyly]

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

[pauses -- then smiles, reaching up to rub Devit's back a little, soothingly]

I'm glad I could do that for you.

[halfcocked.livejournal.com]

[arches into it, flopping down onto his stomach beside Hakuren and leaning a bit]

So that's part of it! I like you for lots of reasons, okay? Talking to you, I don't feel . . . dumb, or like you wish I'd die, or like you're ignoring me!

[a-holy-oak.livejournal.com]

[turns onto his side, still petting]

... There's never been anyone I've wished death to. As for the rest of it -- I don't think you're stupid. When you actually try and apply yourself, you can be rather clever.